Friday, July 1, 2016

Happy Canada Day, Eh

Today we honor Canada for the Canada of July Day (or something like that). Normally I'd find a way to condense as much Canada as possible into a single thing, but tonight I don't have to. The folks at How I Met Your Mother did that for me a few years ago.

Fun fact: Wayne Brady is also from Canada.

Less fun fact: This Wayne Brady is from Columbus, Georgia. But I'm sure there's a Wayne Brady from Canada. He's probably not black though.

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

I'm Home

As trips to visit with a dying friend go, it could have been worse. Brutally hot and a tad uncomfortable, but I was able to talk to him for 3 or 4 hours this morning which really made it worth it.

Monday, June 27, 2016

The Computers Are Smart

The alleged big brains at Cambridge's The Psychometrics Centre (motto: "We put the psycho in psychmetrics!") have created a program (Apply Magic Sauce) that analyzes one's social media presence and draws conclusions about that person. Or, as they put it, it's "[a] personalisation engine that accurately predicts psychological traits from digital footprints of human behaviour."

Let's see how accurately they predict me, starting with age and gender-ish-ness:
Click to embiggen and whatnot

While we can all agree they underestimate my masculinity (which should probably be 110%), they are so eerily accurate with my age that I won't quibble. For the record I'm 31 weeks away from being 50 years + 3 months old.

Next up, intelligence and happiness:
Click to embiggen and whatnot
Even if I have to acknowledge the possibility that I am not always the smartest guy in the room, the % for both feel kinda right for me these days. I especially love the fact that they balance each other (Libra powers activate!). I doubt everyone's values for the 2 sum to 100%, but mine do, which is all that matters.

I'm more intelligent than 68% of the population, and I'm less happy than 68% of the population. This reminds me of a scene from The Opposite of Sex:

Dedee: God. How does a woman get so bitter?
Lucia: Observation.

And finally, teh gayz-ness of me:
Click to embiggen and whatnot
How they describe their conclusions is a big confusing, but I'm pretty sure they're suggesting that, based on my Facebook "likes" there's a 57% chance I'm gay. Or a 157% chance. Either way this is where their program falls apart.

I'm bi-curious.


Still a gold star gay (or a thoroughbred).

Sunday, June 26, 2016

Quote of the Day (Consumer Obfuscation Edition)

Bounty has literally 8 sizes of rolls, and they are all named some variation of "Large", January 17, 2016
By Heavy D Up In The Limousine
This review is from: Bounty Select-A-Size Paper Towels, 12 Huge Rolls (Health and Beauty)

I'm not here to comment on the quality of the paper towels. I'm here to point out the fact that Bounty sells paper towels in the following marketing nonsense sizes: Regular, Large, Big, Giant, Mega, Super, Double, and Huge. This is dumb. Large dumb. Big dumb. Mega dumb. Huge dumb.

I assume the point of all these sizes is to make it impossible to price compare ("wait, which is more, 6 Mega rolls or 8 Giant rolls?"). Intentional obfuscation like this is basically just hostile to screw Bounty.

The above was a useful comment in the customer ratings for the Bounty 6 pack of HUGE rolls.

For Your Consideration; Timothy Olyphant

Outstanding Guest Actor in a Comedy, Timothy Olyphant/Rake Grinder The Grinder

Olyphant shows his versatility playing both himself and a character named Rake.

For Your Consideration: Rob Lowe

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy, The Grinder

Yeah, I said Fred Savage deserved a nomination for playing the straight man here, and Lowe deserves a nomination as well. And probably to win. Rob Lowe has reached a point of post-pin-up respectability that we should take him seriously as a television actor. 

Lowe balances the silly (his scenes as Dean Sanderson, Jr.) with the sillier (flashback scenes of him as Mitch Grinder in the show-within-a-show, also called The Grinder). His work is at least as good as anything Kelsey Grammer, Jim Parsons or Tony Shalhoub turned in during their multiseason wins.  

For Your Consideration: Gina Rodriguez

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy, Jane the Virgin

More than any actress since Lauren Graham went 7 seasons without respect, Gina Rodriguez deserves an Emmy nomination for her performance as the titular heart of Jane the Virgin. The show is a combination of erstwhile family drama, screwball comedy, and telenovela. Balancing those 3 genres requires Rodriguez to provide a relatable character and an emotional throughline.

Rodriguez shows more range than Rachel Bloom (equally nomination worthy for her work in Crazy Ex Girlfriend), although in fairness to Bloom, Rodriguez hasn't shown us she can sing.

Emmy voters need to stop marginalizing performers on shows from post-FOX broadcast networks (Sarah Michelle Gellar, Lauren Graham, Kelly Bishop, Liza Weil, Edward Hermann, Irene Molloy, Lindsay Sloane, Leslie Bibb, Keri Russell). They need to start marginalizing performers on over-rated HBO shows (and, to a lesser extent, Showtime and AMC shows).