Thursday, September 6, 2012

To be fair, maybe those were metric hours

Dreamboat future VP Paul Ryan
Rep. Paul Ryan (R, WI) is a super smart, super serious dude, and he's going to be our next Vice President. So what if he claimed to run a marathon in under 3 hours when, in fact, he ran it in over 4.

Everyone is so upset by this, it's as though they've never hooked up with someone via Craigslist before.

Or an AOL chat room. Or Manhunt. Or Adult Friend Finder.

At least with cam4 you have have them hold up a beer can (which are 4.5" high, by the way [in the gay community this is known as 6-1/2 inches]).

Where was I? Oh, right, marathons. If you're a runner and you want to translate your normal American times into elite Paul Ryan SUPER American times, you can use The Paul Ryan Time Calculator. Remember round up or down as liberally (cough) as you need to make yourself look super hot.

No comments: