Monday, January 24, 2011

Cunt du Jour: Clarence Thomas

This is like a pubic hair on America's Coke!
Cunt du Jour 1/24/11: Justice Clarence Thomas reaching out to honk a boob

Justice Clarence Thomas failed to disclose his batshit crazy wife Ginni's income from various right-wing lobbying entities when filling out his federal financial disclosure forms from 1997 to 2009. Ginni made nearly $686,589 for work between 2003 and 2007 alone. That's about $131,372 a year (assuming she worked all of 2003 through all of 2007), or more than $10,900 a month. So, you know, meager part-time work that any of us would have totally forgotten. Details here.

$2,725 a week.

More than $68 an hour. Who can keep track of the change in their couch cushions?

But Thomas offered a perfectly believable excuse: the forms are too hard to figure out.

"Spousal noninvestment income" is too hard for Clarence Thomas to figure out... and, even better, since he didn't know what it meant, he just checked "no" every time, instead of asking an adult for help. Take a look (this is 2008, but all of them are here). (As Clarence himself would say, "touch it, it gets bigger" [i.e., click to embiggen])
Clarence Thomas's FOR REALS 2008 disclosure thingy that he DIDN'T UNDERSTAND cause it's sooooo hard (that's what she said)

Every time. He didn't even mix it up a little.

And, AND, he signed the thing that said "this is for reals!" Touch it, baby, you know you want to see all the fine, fine print.
More Clarence Thomas for reals 2008 disclosure thing, look at that certification language!!!!

Hey, y'all remember when Bill Clinton LIED under oath in a civil lawsuit?! God that was awful, wasn't it.

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