Saturday, November 7, 2009

Scam du jour

Subject: Secret Shopper Needed

Hello

We have a job opening for the position of Mystery Shopper officer, Mystery Evaluation Inc is a well established Evaluation Firm , We are a company that conduct surveys and evaluate other companies.We get hired to go to other peoples companies and act like customers in order to know how the staffs are handling their services in relation to their customers. once we have a contract to do,you would be directed to the company or outlet or restaurant, and you would be given the funds for the job(either purchase things or require services), after which you would write a comment on the staffs activities and give a detailed record of your experience.

Examples of details you would forward to us are:

1) How long it took you to get services.

2) Smartness of the attendant

3)Customer service professionalism

4)Sometimes you might be required to upset the attendant, to see how they react to clients when they get tensed(under pressure).We turn the information over to the company executives and they would carry out their own duties in improving there services. Most companies employ our assistance when people give complaints about their services, or when they feel there are needs for them to improve their customer service. Here is a chance for you to get a free shopping and dinner out,if you will like to be a Mystery Shoppers.You are to evaluate and give comment on customers services in different

Stores,shops and restaurant in your area code . You will be paid to shop and dine out, you will also have access to free meals, Free Merchandise , Free services , free Travel ,Free entertainment and lot more.Your Identity would be kept confidential as the job states (secret shopper) you would be paid $150 for every survey you carry out, and bonus on your transportation allowance, and funds would be given to you if you have to dine as part of the duty.Your job will be to evaluate and comment on customer service in a wide variety of shops, stores,restaurant and services in your area. No commitment is made on this job, and you would have flexible hours as it suits you.

If you are interested , you have to fill the list below so we can look at your distance from the locations which you have to put your service into, and your address would also be needed for your payments.

Requirements:

You must be RELIABLE, detail-oriented, and write reasonably well, and have access to a computer with Microsoft Word and a reliable Internet connection, must be 19 years old and above,No experience needed .

fill the list below:

to this mail.

Application info needed:

First Name :

Middle Name :

Last Name :

Phone 1 :

Phone 2 :

Address 1 :

Address 2 :

City :

State :

Country United States

Zip Code :

Year of Birth :

Gender :

Disability :

Thanks

Master Hiring

HR Department

Peter Smith
Mystery Evaluation Inc.

At least my blog's not on there


(h/t Bill in Exile)

Flashback song: "My Secret Place"

Also Joni Mitchell's birthday, and I started to post "Free Man in Paris" but changed my mind and decided to go with a song I like, that's not among her "usual suspects"--this is from 1988's Chalk Mark in a Rain Storm and features Peter Gabriel.


Happy birthday dude! Rock on!

A great scene in a great movie with some great actresses

It's also Judy Parfitt's birthday. She was Vera Donovan in the wonderful Dolores Claiborne (directed by Taylor Hackford, and starring Kathy Bates, Jennifer Jason Leigh and David Strathairn at his creepiest). Say it with me kids: "Sometimes being a bitch is all a woman has to hold onto."

Happy birthday dude! Rock on!

Happy birthday Marie Curie

Madame Curie to you and me. Sorry Christopher Knight, but Curie is the first person to win two Nobel Prizes (not the first woman, the first person--and only one of two to win in different fields), and you don't even have a Daytime Emmy nomination. Of course it's well known that her Nobel Prizes in Physics and Chemistry were simply awarded to her for NOT being George W. Bush. Apparently the Nobel Committee has pretty low standards.

Now I could pretend that I'm some old school Curie fan, that I have all her early stuff on vinyl, but that's just silly. She doesn't have any Daytime Emmy nominations either, she's just a scientologist of some kind. So I will simply present you two interesting videos--the first is old school film strip stuff from like 1948.


The second features jazzy guitar and bongos, but is also factually incorrect since Linus Pauling also won Nobel Prizes in two different fields. But at least you don't have to read...

Happy birthday dude!

Song of the day: "Hearing Damage"

From Thom Yorke--it's the 3rd track from the New Moon soundtrack that I've featured, and there are probably another 3 tracks worthy of a spot. It's the new Pretty in Pink soundtrack (Pretty in Pink with Fangs)!

Friday, November 6, 2009

Jon Stewart puts on his Glenn Beck thinking cap

And finds some interesting links.

The Daily Show With Jon StewartMon - Thurs 11p / 10c
The 11/3 Project
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show
Full Episodes
Political HumorHealth Care Crisis

Flashback: 20 years ago/Flashback song: "Tear Me Down"

20 years ago this week the Berlin Wall was demolished, opening West Berlin to the East Germans.

The Wall was the ultimate symbol of the Cold War, and provides symbolism for the brilliant Hedwig and the Angry Inch (which is great live and as a movie--see it). It's glam. It's funny. And it rocks. And they mention Nona Hendryx in a lyric (not this song, in "Midnight Radio").

This explains Sarah Palin's support

(h/t to Eric for the picture and title)


If you've been busy in a cave, Doug Hoffman was the Conservative Party candidate that Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck went to bat for, because Dede Scozzafava (seen here, actually attending the debate) wasn't a conservative enough Republican candidate in a district that was long held by Republicans. Hoffman, it's worth noting, doesn't live in NY-23, but was totally open to moving there if its residents decided he could represent them. Which was awfully sweet of him, don't you think.

Scozzafava decided "fuck it" (more or less), withdrew from the race and endorsed Bill Owens (the Democrat, and an actual resident of NY-23). Owens won and the district, which had been Republican for more than 100 years, is now represented by a Democrat.

Nicely played Palin. Keep up the good work.

(Actually, any- and everyone who threw their support behind a non-resident of the district, regardless of ideology, is a fucking idiot, in my never-humble opinion.)

Happy birthday Mike Nichols

The man is a genius. Genius. He has directed some of my favorite movies, including The Graduate, Silkwood, Biloxi Blues and Angels in America to name just a few. He has earned seven Tonys for directing, one Oscar, four Emmys (for directing and producing), and a Grammy (for comedy album with long-time collaborator Elaine May), making him the 9th person to have completed the Grand Slam of show business awards. By the way, in Trivial Pursuit they claim Rita Moreno is the first person to do this, but she's not (sorry Rita, you completed your set at a relatively young age, but Helen Hayes and Richard Rodgers both beat you).

Nichols got his start in comedy, back in the early 60s, when comedy was more "sketch" and not stand-up. Nichols & May won the comedy album Grammy back in 1961, for stuff like this (by the way, randomly, I have a cd of their comedy in my car but I don't play it much):


From comedy to Broadway, where in 1963 Nichols got the opportunity to direct Neil Simon's Barefoot in the Park starring Elizabeth Ashley and Robert Redford. I wonder what ever happened to them. Nichols picked up his first Tony, and began a long run of collaboration with Neil Simon, directing The Odd Couple, Plaza Suite and The Prisoner of Second Avenue to additional Tonys.

He also go to direct some movies, including his first Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?; WAVA received a nomination in every category for which it was eligible (a feat made possible by having only 4 actors), and received 5 Oscars including awards for Elizabeth Taylor and the wonderful Haskell Wexler (a favorite cinematographer of mine, and yes I have favorite cinematographers). Years later I watched a documentary on cinematography and they talked about the choices Wexler made to create the mood for the movie; in this case using a lot of medium and close shots to give a feeling of claustrophobia.


But Nichols had to wait to pick up his Oscar, winning a few years later for The Graduate. That was the only Oscar for The Graduate, and considering In the Heat of the Night was the big winner, that's a good example of how Oscars might be served by a 5-year delay. And if you haven't seen The Graduate, make that your rental for the weekend.


I've not seen Carnal Knowledge, Catch-22 or The Fortune all the way through, but each has some merit from what I understand. His next trip to the Oscars was with the biopic Silkwood, his first collaboration with Meryl Streep. Streep and Cher both earned well deserved Oscar nominations (Kurt Russell deserved a nomination as well). The movie went home empty handed that night, but I think it's a nicely crafted movie that's well worth seeing.


Nichols get his next Oscar nomination for directing Working Girl, but I far prefer Biloxi Blues from that same year. Christopher Walken, you were robbed of a nomination.


Postcards from the Edge
, The Birdcage (a collaboration with Elaine May, who adapted the screenplay), Closer and Charlie Wilson's War all have merit. But I will transition over to 2 fantastic pieces he did for HBO. First, transforming the play Wit to an elegant made for TV movie starring Emma Thompson. Thompson and Nichols shared the writing, for which they both got an Emmy nomination, and Nichols won his first two Emmys for producing and directing (Thompson also earned an Emmy as lead actress). It's a downer, but it's good.


It's worth noting that, when Meryl Streep did The Devil Wears Prada, she wasn't imitating Anna Wintour of Vogue, she was channeling Mike Nichols. Down to the hair color. "No no, that wasn't a question" is a direct quote from Nichols from an early collaboration.

My final piece is perhaps Nichols's best and most ambitious piece, the mini-series of Angels in America. Angels was originally 2 companion piece plays, winning back-to-back Pulitzer Prizes and Tony Awards in 1993 and 1994. The plays are complex and use an ensemble of actors to play multiple parts and also a big fucking angel swoops in and scares the shit out of everyone. It's about AIDS, the Cold War, Mormons, and being gay. The miniseries runs a good 6 hours and it is captivating. The miniseries dominated that year's Emmys, sweeping the acting categories with Emmys for Al Pacino, Meryl Streep, Jeffrey Wright and Mary-Louise Parker. Nichols earned 2 more: directing and producing. My mother loves this thing, she LOVES it. She wants to make a Trivial Pursuit edition specifically for it. I'll say that it's an amazing piece of work, and absolutely worth the investment of a weekend to watch.

And he's married to Diane Sawyer.

Happy birthday dude! Keep on rocking and thanks for all the great shit!

Song of the day: "Think I Need It Too"

So Foo Fighters, who are now 15 years old as a group started the week, then Gordon Gano, who's still kicking 30 years in gave us something in a new incarnation, and now we finish the work week with new shit from Echo and the Bunnymen. And just to set your expectations (what with Morrissey's recent collapse and all), Ian McCulloch totally has a comb over these days. But I really like the song, enjoy.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Happy birthday Ryan Adams

Crap, I wrote an intro to this using an app on my phone and it's lost. It included a nice intro using Kozmo.com as my teaser. And now it's gone. Fuck it.

My first exposure was this song, and I still think it's one of his best, from his first solo album Heartbreaker:


Next up, another fantastic song from Heartbreaker, a duet with Emmylou Harris:


His second solo CD, Gold, had a slightly different, less country, sound. The first single, "New York, New York" had a video filmed in front of the World Trade Center on September 10, 2001 (watch the actual video here), and that imagery likely helped get the track attention, but it's also a pretty good single.


Next up is another track from Gold that took on a life all its own, "When the Stars Go Blue." Listen to the original, then to a cover by The Corrs (with Bono), then a #1 country hit for Tim McGraw. One of these things is not like the others.






I should point out that I've since gotten some Whiskeytown CDs, which was Ryan's life before his solo career. And since leaving he's been churning out a fucking ton of music every year. Which is annoying if you're middle-aged. I don't have time for someone prolific--I will settle for The Blue Nile and their "once every 7 or 8 years" release schedule, thanks.

Also he married Mandy Moore. Congrats y'all.

So I will leave you off with his cover of Oasis's "Wonderwall" cause, well, why not. Noel Gallagher, the song's writer, loves this version.


Happy birthday dude! Rock on! Just, you know, not so frequently. I'm too old to keep up.

Flashback song: "My Kind of Girl"

This song is older than me! (Finally.) Matt Monro from 1961; Matt's biggest claim to fame in the US is as the singer of "Born Free" and the theme to From Russia with Love. Dude had some pipes. So all you Mel Torme and Michael Buble fans out there, enjoy.

Popular music history, with Professor Coffey

Ok so when Madonna says, "Open your heart to me" it implies the other person has the receptacle but then she says "I hold the lock and you hold the key."

She's mixing perspectives.

There is no harder thing than to have Glenn Beck outlive your child


Victim In Fatal Car Accident Tragically Not Glenn Beck

Everyone in Nigeria is dying, and I am their only heir?

Yet another amazing offer that is totally legitimate and in no way a scam. After all, it is totally true that I am a highly respected personality and that human resource profile database didn't say anything about my inappropriate behavior or attire while at work. Hooray for me!

Adekunle F. Jemoris & Associates
Attorney At Law, Property
Consultant & Solicitor To
The Supreme Court Of Nigeria
Plot 228 Kudirat Abiola Way,
Oregun,Lagos-Nigeria.


Dear Friend,

Kindly accept my apology for sending unsolicited mail to you. I believe you are a highly respected personality, considering the fact that I sourced your profile from a human resource profile database on your country. Though, I do not know to what extent you are familiar with events.

Well, I am Barrister Adekunle F. Jemoris, a Solicitor. I am the Personal Attorney to Mr. Steve A. who used to work with Agip Oil Company in Nigeria. On the 21st of April 2003, his wife and their three children were involved in a car accident along Abuja Express Road.

Unfortunately, they all lost their lives in the event of the accident. Since then I have made several enquiries to your Embassy to locate any of my client's relatives, this has also proved unsuccessful. After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to trace his relatives over the Internet to locate any member of his family but to no avail, hence, I contacted you to assist in repatriating the money left behind by my client in a Bank.

Particularly, the Finance House where the deceased deposited the US$15 Million (Fifteen Million United States Dollars only) knows me very well and has ask me to present some one to claim the fund left my late client as they all know I am his attorney.

Consequently, this Bank issued me a notice to provide the Next of Kin to claim the US$15 Million (Fifteen Million United States Dollars only) in their custody within the next ten official working days. Since I have been unsuccessful in locating the relatives for over 5 years now, I seek your consent to present you as the next of kin of the deceased to claim the fund as the Next of Kin to him so that the Bank will transfer the fund to your account.

Upon receipt of the fund, I will come over to your country to meet with you for the disbursement of the fund and then you and I will share the money in this order: 70% will be for me, 30% will be for you. I have all the necessary legal documents that can back our claim we may make with the Bank.

All I require is your honest co-operation to enable us seeing this deal through. I guarantee that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law.

Finally you can contact me through my email address [DELETED]

Best regards.
Adekunle F. Jemoris
Principal Attorney.

22 CIA agents convicted in Italy

Glenn Greenwald's article (here) is worth reading, all snarkiness aside.

Colbert on Limbaugh and future Republican victors over Obama

Tip/Wag - Rush Limbaugh & Us Weekly
The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full EpisodesPolitical HumorU.S. Speedskating

Say it ain't so Joe, complete hyprocritical asshole edition

Rep. Joe "you lie!" Wilson (the racist-tinged "boy" was silent) (R, SC) is mad. He's mad at the Federal government because there isn't enough H1N1 vaccine. Here's what he said:
"The current administration is solely responsible. They can't blame this on any prior administration. This is the responsibility of the current administration. They've put the lives of Americans at risk."
Which is totally awesome for a few reasons.

First, Wilson makes it abundantly clear that he is now a socialist. Who can solve this problem? Not the free market. Not some John Galt-esque hero with the foresight to create a vaccine of his own capitalist initiative. Nope, just the big old government. Welcome Comrade Wilson, to a socialist state where the government has to help with this particular healthcare issue.

Second, and even better, was that when it came to a vote to fund H1N1 vaccine production, Wilson voted "NO!" (and you totally have to think of it like a bratty 6-year old screaming that from the backseat of a minivan after being told he needs to share his Fruit Roll-up with his sister--because that's the mentality of Joe Wilson).

And third, Wilson's concerns aren't driven by a general concern for his constituents, but for himself and his family. You see, his wife has H1N1. Now he cares.

Anyway, welcome to socialism Joe!

Song of the day: "Man in the Sand"

When I heard this a couple weeks ago, I had no idea Gordon Gano (Violent Femmes) had something new coming out (but shit, wait until you see who has new stuff tomorrow). The band is billed as Gordon Gano & The Ryans. Great song, although more "summer" than "autumn."

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Flashback song: "Ladies Who Lunch"

Had a wonderful "ladies who lunch" happy hour tonight with the fabulous Clinton and the not yet modifier-laden Kassie (you'll get there). The Long Islands and the absence of Glee makes me want to include this Sondheim classic from the delicious movie Camp. If you haven't seen it, do. If you work with me, I can loan you a copy. And "rummy" in the clip is the one and only Don Dixon.

Palinoia

Matt Taibbi's fun take on Sarah Palin's resignation, in anticipation of her forthcoming book.
This amazing gaffe reminded everyone of what we might have to look forward to in 2012, when the Republican Party may well nominate a woman who would lose at Trivial Pursuit to a Chilean sea bass, who makes George W. Bush look like Sir Isaac Newton. What’s incredible about Palin isn’t that she has a few gaps in her knowledge base, but that she doesn’t know anything about anything at all; she moreover doesn’t seem to feel the need to make sure one idea follows the next when she talks, instead just blurting out random unconnected bits and pieces of deep-seated resentment and persecution complex. Even ideological consistency is an alien concept to her (she wears her religious fundamentalism on her sleeve, but lets her unmarried daughter shack up with a human hard-on in the next room over) and she appears to resent the notion that it shouldn’t be.

Email subject line of the day

Viagra will help you in any situation.

I had no idea.

Drowning? Viagra

Forest fire?
Viagra

Red wine stain?
Viagra

Plague of locust?
Viagra

Choking on food?
Viagra

Dead hooker?
Viagra

Good to know.

Flashback: Iranian hostage crisis

30 years ago this week. ABC's Nightline debuted a few days into the crisis as a way to report on that one specific story until its resolution. Its popularity as a source of information kept it on the air (with ratings generally higher than the late night comedy/talk shows) ever since.

Happy birthday Matthew McConaughey

Or however you spell your name. Since a picture is worth a thousand words, here's 2,000 words to summarize MM's contributions to film.


I wanted to find the Family Guy clip that includes him and Stewie, but can't find it. So I'll just add this video from Funny or Die:

Is Dick going soft?

There's not much I can do except point out that Jon Stewart is the best possible person to cover Dick Cheney.

The Daily Show With Jon StewartMon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Is Our Dick Going Soft?
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show
Full Episodes
Political HumorHealth Care Crisis

Colbert goes to Salt Lake City

For his recent Nailed 'Em segment: Does the Mormon Church prosecute all PDAs equally?

Of course (cough) they do. Just watch. It's also worth reminding everyone that blacks weren't welcome into the Mormon Church until the Federal government threatened to pull their tax-exempt status. God's love looks just like God's bigotry! (What, you know Jesus never hung out with no darkies, did he? Wait, he was?)


The Colbert Report
Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Nailed 'Em - Mormon Church Trespassing
www.colbertnation.com

Colbert Report Full Episodes
Political Humor
U.S. Speedskating

Gay marriage/civil unions


Too early to know for sure, but it looks like Maine's gay marriage law will be overturned (hooray, when do we get to vote on taking away inter-racial and mixed religion marriage rights?), but Washington will uphold its sweet sweet "separate but totally equal except for people who don't understand it's supposed to be equal" civil unions thing. Except, you know, for Federal rights or anything.

So hooray. Take a drink!

Song of the day: "Fireflies"

So there's something living near my house--possibly a pterodactyl. Its wingspan is large, it flies at night, and sounds "just like a pterodactyl." How does someone know what the long-extinct pterodactyl sounds like? "Shut up" is what it sounds like. Read your bible. There.

Anyway, yeah, fast forward to me trying to figure out if owls might be an option. Do owls live in cities? I googled "owl city" and lo and behold that's a band name with a current hit. A song I'd never heard before but I like. It sounds like dude from Death Cab (you know, the guy soon to be divorced from Zooey Deschanel) relying a little too much on an autotuner. This is currently among the biggest selling/downloaded songs on iTunes now. Enjoy. [UPDATE: This was a free download of the week on iTunes a few weeks ago, which is why it was among the most downloaded. But I bought the whole thing on Amazon for $5 and I like it a lot.]

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Happy birthday Rosanne (is it Barr now?)

I had seen her stand-up once or twice on TV before her sitcom. Her voice is cloying, but the material was really fresh at the time. I don't know that she was ground-breaking as a woman in comedy, but I think her honest "housewife turned comedienne" bit made her unique.


When Rosanne debuted, I didn't care for it (despite Gunther telling me the show reminded him of dinner at my house). And then a few years in, it crept into my TV viewing schedule, thanks to its adjacency to Coach and thirtysomething. This was around the time tabloids reported Rosanne Barr Arnold was acting like a diva and fired all her writers. And you know what, she made that show funny. And interesting. And she picked up an Emmy and a Peabody award.


This is something of a shortened post--sorry Roz--got a report to work on (apparently I was preoccupied today). Rosanne's website seems like it's got some interesting stuff, so explore.

Flashback song: "Hounds of Love"

I was uploading a different batch of songs to my phone/media player and saw this among my Kate Bush tracks. I love the urgency of the percussion. The title track from her 1985 release, it expanded her from cult icon in the US, although she had a considerable and devoted fan base around the world well before.

A new and urgent message from the FBI!!!

To:

ROBERT MUELLER III
EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR FBI
FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION FBI.WASHINGTON DC.
Email: www-fbiusgov3@live.com [FANTASTIC, HAD TO LEAVE THAT]


FBI SEEKING TO WIRETAP INTERNET


ATTENTION:


We believe this notification meets you in a very good present state of mind and health. We the Federal bureau of investigation (FBI) Washington, DC in conjunction with some other relevant Investigation Agencies here in the United states of America have recently been informed through our Global intelligence monitoring network that you presently have a transaction going on with the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) as regards to your over-due contract payment which was fully endorsed in your favor accordingly.

We will find a way to fix a schedule for you to come to our head-quarter in Washington DC to enable us advise you on what to do, but meanwhile you are further advised to be contacting us via email for now because we are having various investigations that we are working on now. Keep everything regarding to your transaction confidential for security reasons and note that we have not informed the local FBI department in your state regarding this matter because we want to keep everything secret until your fund is been transferred to you accordingly. We the FBI have purposely create an email in order for us to contact you personally and our phone codes departments are not aware of this new improvement,so don't call our service line regarding this email, soon we will provide you with a line you can call for more information about this contract winning funds.For the main time we the Federal Bureau of Investigation Washington DC will be helping you to monitor all the transaction with the Central Bank of Nigeria. we

It might interest you to know that we have taken out time in screening through this project as stipulated on our protocol of operation and have finally confirmed that your contract payment is 100% genuine and hitch free from all facet and of which you have the lawful right to claim your fund without any further delay.Having said all this, we will further advise that you go ahead in dealing with the Central Bank office accordingly as we will be monitoring all their services with you as well as your correspondence at all level.

In addendum, also be informed that we recently had a meeting with the Mr. Tunde Lemo The one incharge of funds transfer in Central Bank of Nigeria, in the person of Mr. Tunde Lemo along with some of the top officials of the Ministry regarding your case and they made us to understand that your file has been held in abase depending on when you personally come for the claim. They also told us that the only problem they are facing right now is that some unscrupulous element are using this project as an avenue to scam innocent people off their hard earned money by impersonating the Executive Governor and the Central Bank office.

We were also made to understand that a lady with name Mrs. Janet White from ARIZONA has already contacted them and also presented to them all the necessary documentations evidencing your claim purported to have been signed personally by you prior to the release of your contract fund valued at about US$10,000,000.00 (Ten Million united states dollars), but the Central Bank office did the wise thing by insisting on hearing from you personally before the go ahead on wiring your fund to the Bank informations which was forwarded to them by the above named Lady so that was the main reason why they contacted us so as to assist them in making the investigations.

They further informed us that we should warn our dear citizens who must have been informed of the contract payment which was awarded to them from the Central Bank of Nigeria, to be very careful prior to this irregularities so that they don't fall victim to this ugly circumstance. And should in case you are already dealing with anybody or office claiming to be from the Central Bank of Nigeria, you are further advised to STOP further contact with them in your best interest and then contact immediately the real office of the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) only with the below informations accordingly:

NAME: MR. TUNDE LEMO
OFFICE ADDRESS: Central Bank of Nigeria, Central Business
District,Cadastral Zone, Abuja,
Federal Capital Territory,
Nigeria.
TEL: +234 706-290-3101
Email: DELETED

NOTE:

In your best interest, any message that doesn't come from the above official email address and phone numbers should not be replied to and should be disregarded accordingly for security reasons. Meanwhile, we will advise that you contact the Central Bank office immediately with the above email address and request that they attend to you payment file as directed so as to enable you receive your contract fund accordingly.Ensure you follow all their procedure as may be required by them as that will further help hasten up the whole procedures as regards to the transfer of your fund to you as designated. Also have in mind that the Central Bank of Nigeria equally have their own protocol of operation as stipulated on their banking terms, so delay could be very dangerous. Once again, we will advise that you contact them with the above email address and make sure you forward to them all the necessary informations which they may require from you prior to the release of your fund to you accordingly.

All modalities has already been worked out even before you were contacted and note that we will be monitoring all your dealings with them as you proceed so you don't have anything to worry about. All we require from you henceforth is an update so as to enable us be on track with you and the Central Bank of Nigeria. Without wasting much time, will want you to contact them immediately with the above email address so as to enable them attend to your case accordingly without any further delay as time is already running out. Should in case you need any more informations in regards to this notification, feel free to get back to us so that we can brief you more as we are here to guide you during and after this project has been completely perfected and you have received your contract fund as stated.Thank you very much for your anticipated co-operation in advance as we earnestly await your urgent response to this matter.

Best Regards,

Robert S. Mueller III
Federal Bureau of Investigation
J. Edgar Hoover Building
935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW Washington, D.C.
20535-0001, USA
Email: www-fbiusgov3@live.com

While I was bitching about something else, this happened

The Senate confirmed Dr. Regina Benjamin as Surgeon General. Just in time for H1N1 crazy! (Well, she gets to join that show already in progress.)

Congratulations to Dr. Benjamin.

And about fucking time to Sen. Harry Reid (D, NV) and the rest of the US Senate. Next up: Dawn Johnsen.

Profiles in courage: Senator David Vitter

(h/t BarbinMD at DailyKos here)

Previously on the Rebel Agenda, we discussed 30 Republican Senators who voted in opposition to an amendment to a Defense Spending bill that would restrict Federal contracts from companies that do not allow their employees to go to court if they happen to be raped by co-workers. As a woman was. And Halliburton/KBR (a company Dick Cheney STILL owns a shitload of stock options in, as he was giving them massive no bid contracts, just saying...) had just a situation happen. So it's not like this was just some paranoid idea Sen. Al Franken (D, MN; hey, what's Rush Limbaugh again?) had.

Senator David Vitter (R, LA), a man who frequents prostitutes and has a fetish for diapers, a man whose wife is a total fucking hypocritical idiot, had the courage to vote against that amendment. Why? Because David Vitter is totally in favor of rape. I mean, that might not be what he says, but clearly we know it to be true. It's just embarrassing to say that, which is why, when he was confronted by a constituent and asked about his vote, he sidestepped the issue and got the fuck out of there.


Look y'all, it's just rape. It's not like he forced healthcare on her. That would be offensive. Louisianans would never stand for that (despite that state being among the most in need of healthcare)!

So here's to you, Sen. David Vitter, for standing up for rapists while fighting against your constituents in need of healthcare.

Sad news: someone died

Happy news: he left me $7.5 million! Woohoo

DELIVERY OF YOUR PACKAGE FROM MR.GARY MORGAN
--------------------------------------------------
I am a Diplomat by name Gary Morgan,mandated to deliver your inheritance to you in your country of residence.

The funds total is US$7.5 Million and you were made the beneficiary of these funds by a benefactor whose details will be revealed to you after handing over the funds to you in accordance with the Agreement I signed with the benefactor when he enlisted my assistance in delivering the funds to you.

We have done our due diligence and have confirmed that the package rightfully belongs to you and it is no threat to National Security. Consequently, we have agreed that the delivery of this package of yours be completed without further delay and has been mandated to be effected within 72 hours.

However, before the delivery is effected, we need you to reconfirm the following informations so that the funds will not be delivered to someone else.

1.Full Name
2.Residential Address
3.Age
4.Occupation
5.Direct Telephone Numbers

After verification of the information with what I have on file,I shall contact you so that we can make arrangements on the exact time I will be bringing your package to your residential address.

Send the requested information so that we can proceed.

Regards,

Gary Morgan.

Song of the day: "Wheels"

Tis' the season, I guess, since I heard a bunch of new stuff on Monday alone. Here's new Foo (Fighters, that is).

Nigeria please

Attention: Fund Beneficiary,

Final Funds
Release Order

In consideration of the legislative/legal resolution reached by the World Governing Bodies that is the United States Government, British Government, IMF, FBI, INTERPOL, UNO, World Bank Group and the European Union Commission Committees on Financial Matters following the complaint and petition received from the office of the President and Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces of the Federal Republic of Nigeria (ALHAJI UMARU MUSA YAR'ADUA) over the non-payment of foreign beneficiary payments, this adhoc committee on fact finding and foreign payment was inaugurated to release immediately all the payment that have received approval and endorsements from the various agencies/offices. From the records of outstanding beneficiaries due for payment with the Federal Government Of Nigeria your name was discovered as next on the list of beneficiaries whose records are sufficient to receive their overdue payment but was marred by various fees imposed on them by their so-called representatives who end I wish to inform y

To this effect, you are required to indicate your mode of payment.

1) BY SWIFT WIRE TRANSFER (KTT)
2) BY DIPLOMATIC CASH DELIVERY TO YOUR DOOR STEP
3) BY CERTIFY INTERNATIONAL BANK DRAFT
4) BY ATM MASTER CARD.

Note that each mode of payment you consider convenient, you are obligated to make a payment of $250.00 only for the processing and handling fees. This fee can not be dedcuted from your approved payment as your approved fund has been bonded and insured, therefore we can not make any deduction from it.


Also reconfirm the following information to me my E-mail address (DELETED)for final ratification exercise:

1} Your Full Name:
2} Your Contact Telephone and Fax Number:
3} Your Full Address:
4} Your Marital Status, Profession and Age:
5} Your receiving bank details:
6} Your International Passport/Driving License Number:


As soon as this Information is received, your payment will me released to you as you deem fit through our most reliable payment channels within the shortest possible time. Your banking coordinates is only relevant if you choose the first mode of payment. The wiring instructions will be availed to you as soon as we receive your response to this final payment release order.

Your urgent answer is needed.

Yours in Service

Best Regards

Mr.Charles LarryMCkin
Chairman of the Committee

Monday, November 2, 2009

So this means I don't have to take my shoes off at the airport anymore?

"I believe we have more to fear from the potential of that bill passing than we do from any terrorist right now in any country."--Rep. Virginia Foxx (R, NC)
That's an elected Congressperson declaring healthcare reform a greater threat than terrorism.

Which means we've won the war on terror! Say amen somebody!

I wonder what crotchety old Rep. Foxx thinks of public education. "Evil... evil!" I'm sure.

I don't know where to begin

My quick response was needed

From this very legitimate business opportunity. Very legitimate. Because how else, besides bulk emails, could you possibly find someone to help you conduct financial transactions?

INTEGRATE FABRICS & GALLERIES. 67G Charter house street, London EC1M 3HN Dear, This offer is only for those who like to Work Online from home/office and get paid weekly. We are glad to offer you a job position in our company, INTEGRATED FABRICS & GALLERIES. We need someone to work for the company as representative in the UNITED STATE OF AMERICA. This is in view of our not having an office presently in the USA..You don’t need to have an Office and this certainly wont disturb any form of work you have going at the moment Our costumers, which we supply weekly in the states. Our integrated yarn and fabric manufacturing operations use state-of-the-art textile equipment from the worlds leading suppliers. Order processing, production monitoring and process flow are seamlessly integrated through a company-wide computer network. We are searching for Representative in State, who wish to work temporarily (part time work) under the film, you will be allow to contain our customers direct to receive order from our customers in America. About the job: We have sales representatives all over the world to distribute our products.It's a known fact, that it's not easy to start a business in a new market (being the US). There are hundreds of competitors, close direct contacts between suppliers and customers and other difficulties, which impede our sales. We have decided to deliver the products upfront, Presently with the amount of Orders we have, we cannot put them on hold for fear of loosing the customers outrightly. Secondly we cannot cash these payments from the US soon enough, as international Cheques take about 15-20 working days for cash to be made available. Your task is to coordinate payments from customers and help us with the payment process. You are not involved in any sales or marketing. After this has been done the customer has to pay for the products.About 90 percent of our customers prefer to pay through Certified Cheques and Traveller's cheques on the amount involved. We have decided to open this new job position for solving this problem. Your tasks are: 1.Recieve payment from Customers. 2.Cash Payments at your Bank. 3.Deduct 10% which will be your commission/pay on each Payment processed. 4.Forward balance after deduction of commission /pay to any of the offices you will be contacted to send payment through Western Union Money Transfer. www.westernunion.com or Money Gram. Our payments will be issued out in your name and you can have them cashed at your bank or other Cashing Services. ONLY SERIOUS AND INTERESTED PARTICIPANTS SHOULD PLEASE REPLY. IF YOU ARE INTERESTED KINDLY FILL THE EMPLOYMENT FORM BELOW: EMPLOYMENT FORM: FULL NAME: HOME ADDRESS: CITY: STATE: ZIP CODE: COUNTRY: MARITAL STATUS (SINGLE/MARRIED): SEX: TELEPHONE NUMBER: OCCUPATION: AGE: E-MAIL: BANK NAME (Bank Name Only And Nothing Else): Thanks in INTEGRATE FABRICS & GALLERIES. 67G Charter house street, London EC1M 3HN

Crazy-ass screed of the day

(h/t Salon)

Orly Taitz finally responded to her most recent case dismissal in her quest for truth about the usurper Barrack Hussein Obama/Barry Sortero. At first I thought I would just post a couple of key excerpts, but there is just too much good shit in here. 

Clearly it is not the end of the road. We will continue. I need some time to study this order and provide full answer point by point. I will not give a full analysis of judge Carter’s orders at the moment. Today I was inundated with phone calls from different media outlets ... One interview I remebered. It was with Jessica Rosenthal from FOX radio. She asked me, when will I give up? I asked her in turn: “Jessica, when do you give up on the Constitution of this country? When do you give up on your constitutional rights for redress of grievances, for your right not to be defrauded by the government, not be treated as a slave?”

While I will not address the legal aspects of the order today, I will address a couple of issues relating to me personally, as I can see a concerted effort to assassinate my character similar to what was done to Sarah Palin, when she joined McCain, when within a day McCain-Palin ticket was 12 points ahead of Obama. What did Chicago combine do? They assassinated her character. So I have to address some of those issues, because it appears that the media has named me a leader of this movement. I am the only attorney, who brought legal actions from plaintiffs with real standing. I brought actions from active duty military and state representatives. My opposition see me as a threat. What was done? Some puppets were used to defame me, slander me, write garbage letters to judge Carter .... I hoped that this judge had more integrity of character, I guess I was wrong.

Another point – Judge Carter state in court and in his order that I told people to call him This is not true. Who told it to judge Carter? His new clerk, fresh out of Perkins Coie, law firm, that represented Obama, in some 100 cases? ...

Citizens seem to have no voice, they have no standing to bring any legal actions in face of any fraud. They only have standing to pay taxes and pay for the judges, clerks, congress and senate who never address any issues. They should have no concerns about an inhabitant of the White house sporting 39 social security numbers, some are the social security numbers of the deceased. How long will it take for those citizens to revolt? Washington Post has written that 8 out of 10 Americans know about this issue. According to AOL-it’s 85%. This number is growing. How long will those people be silent? 4,5 million marched on Washington DC on September the 12th. How many will march next time around, when so many loose their jobs (half a million jobs every month officially) and probably double that number unofficially. When they loose their homes at a rate higher then the rate during great depression. When they become numb from hatred against this fraudulent usurper in the White House, corrupt politicians and corrupt judges. Who will stop them? A few snooty remarks on MSM and on the faithful to regime lap dog blogs like Politijab, Salon or Politico? When people loose their voice, when they are livid from the arrogance shown by the ruling elite, they simply revolt.
Notes: all this shit above=sic; "according to AOL"=hysterical (my penis is 8.5" on AOL); and 4.5 million marched on Washington DC on 9/12? What year! Anyway, enjoy.

Happy birthday k.d. lang

So I am going to begin this with a more general question: how does one successfully get society to ignore standards for copy-editing in such a way that the world thinks of you in lower case letters exclusively? I mean, e.e. cummings, I get--it's based on his writing style. Which is why we will call him KANYE WEST next year--he doesn't know that there's a caps lock key on his keyboard.

My first exposure to Kathy Dawn Lang was in 1987, when we started playing her first US release, Angel with a Lariat (then credited as k.d. lang and the reclines), at my college radio station. When you start on the air, you're doing 2 to 6 a.m. shifts, and typically you get some of the longer album tracks programmed for that time. For me that was typically stuff from The Mission, Nitzer Ebb, and Sisters of Mercy, which made k.d. a bracing change. My favorite track from the album, "Diet of Strange Places," isn't on the giant series of tubes (there's a cover that sounds like people have never actually heard the song that I will pass on). "Three Cigarettes in an Ashtray" is a cover of a song Patsy Cline did about 50 years ago (I mean, from now, back then like 30 years before).  By the way, this was the look she was cultivating at that time. I'm not sure if we blame this on her being Canadian, her being a lesbian, or it being the 80s; possibly a caustic combination of all three.


Her next album, the moody and elegant Shadowland, embraced very traditional country roots, produced by the legendary Owen Bradley and covering a variety of standards by songwriters like Roger Miller and Bob Wills, and newer songs by folks like Chris Isaak and Harlan Howard. She included Loretta Lynn, Kitty Wells and Brenda Lee on the "Honkey Tonk Angels" medley. [A quick aside--I'm more than 90% sure that "Honkey Tonk Angels" was nominated in the Grammy category for country vocal collaboration, and lost to a different collaboration of lang's, but her Wikipedia page only shows 5 total Grammy nominations--which is wrong! And on that I know I'm right, just go to the list of Album of the Year nominees and you'll see Ingenue was nominated, but does not show as a nomination on lang's page... and yes, I totally get that I could be fixing that myself. SIGH!]

But lang didn't win a Grammy for "Honkey Tonk Angels" instead picking up that award for her astounding duet with Roy Orbison, covering his classic "Crying." Noting Jay Leno's hair, I'm thinking the 80s may have had a lot to do with k.d.'s fashion issues.


Her 1989 album Absolute Torch and Twang helped establish her on US country radio. She picked up at least one Grammy nomination (cough) and in one of Entertainment Weekly's first issues (possibly its very first) they awarded her their Un-Grammy, as she was this fantastic artist that the Grammys would never ever get around to honoring. Which was great except that she had already won a real Grammy the year before, and those are so much more impressive on the mantle. Here's "Big Boned Gal" from that album:


It was during the Torch and Twang tour that Chris Wilson and I got to meet k.d. (and more impressively, the fabulous Jan Hooks, who is from Decatur--big thanks to, shit, forgot her name, worked at the radio station as our receptionist and then at Warner Bros. records... long hair... incredibly nice... crap... thanks again person whose name I don't recall, for taking the initiative to introduce us to Hooks and getting all of us over to say hi to k.d.). That night, because Chris was involved, k.d. lang was dubbed our Cajun Saint (in lieu of Patron Saint). [UPDATE: Elizabeth! I don't recall her last name, but pretty sure it was Elizabeth.]

With 1993's album Ingenue she crossed over to mainstream pop radio, which you know if you've been to the dentist in the last 16 years. The album is fantastic and her writing is top notch--I think she either got dumped or was working through some unrequited love; that shit makes for good albums. That year's Grammy awards were tough for me, as she went head to head with Annie Lennox in the top category (Record of the Year, Song of the Year, Album of the Year [losing all three to Eric Clapton] and Pop Female Vocalist--suck on that Wikipedia entry idiots). Lang picked up Pop Female Vocalist for "Constant Craving" (Lennox's consolation prize was the Long-Form Video Grammy). Instead of playing "Constant Craving" I'm picking "Miss Chatelaine," a song that is best enjoyed with a Lawrence Welk-esque flurry of bubbles.


And because I am middle-aged, I haven't gotten her last several albums. Which isn't entirely true, since I ran across "The Consequences of Falling" from Invincible Summer while shuffling through songs on my ride home last Friday. But I didn't love any of them. So here are some favorite tracks of hers from the last 15 years. Starting with "Surrender," the closing credits song from the James Bond movie Tomorrow Never Dies. I like it, although the "let's try to redo 'Goldfinger' thing" is a little played out--still this is much better than the Sheryl Crow title track that accompanied the opening credits.


Next up is her duet with the wonderful Jane Siberry. We should have a separate discussion about Jane, but if you're feeling inquisitive, look her up. She's the basis for one of my three Pandora channels. This is "Calling All Angels" which has had a pretty good run in movies and TV. [UPDATE: Thanks to Kennedy for pointing out that I posted a non-duet version, so I've updated.]


And finally, "The Consequences of Falling"


A few years ago, rumor has it she made friends with my pal Sam (with whom I've lost track, although I heard he might move to Seattle to work for Boeing). Sam's story is amazing (he deserted the Iraqi army during the original Gulf War because Qusay Hussein disliked Sam from elementary school and kept sending orders for missions that were likely to get Sam killed... as Sam says "it was totally suck"). I guess I don't know what's up with either of them, so perhaps they formed a support group for people I don't keep up with these days.

Now you know.

Happy birthday dude! Rock on!

Flashback song: "Right Back Where We Started From"

It's Maxine Nightengale's birthday, and while she doesn't get the coveted birthday du jour slot (see how special you are Marc Shaiman), I will take this opportunity to overlook the grammatically problematic song title and lyrics, to give her a quick shout out with this flashback to 1979.

Happy birthday Marcia Wallace

Belatedly. Sunday went by quickly.

Marcia won an Emmy as the voice of Edna Krabappel on The Simpsons, but I loved her from the 1970s when she was on The Bob Newhart Show. She has also had a long run as a game show celebrity on shows like Hollywood Squares and Password, so is this appearance:




There are no clips from The Bob Newhart Show, but there are full episodes on hulu. Meantime, enjoy this knock-off.


Belated happy birthday!

Song of the day: "Barcelona"

By Plasticenes... I'm pretty sure I spelled that correctly.