"I hope Jesus likes the word 'fuck.'"
My aunt, regarding her recently deceased relative.
"Though none of the actors are given much screen time, a remarkable number of them create fully formed characters in only a few scenes."
According to Clive Langer, he'd written the tune for Robert Wyatt but wasn't happy with the lyrics that he had written himself. Langer played the tune to Costello at a party hosted by Nick Lowe, and within days Costello had written lyrics he described as "the best lyrics I've ever written"
Is it worth it
A new winter coat and shoes for the wife
And a bicycle on the boy's birthday
"Well, if you go to the socialized medicine countries, you find about 20 percent worse results. You get it? One in five people have to die because they went to socialized medicine! Now, I’ve got three daughters and a wife. I would hate to think that, among five women, one of them is going to die because we go to socialized care, and we have to have these long lists."--Louis Gohmert (R-TX)
"I wouldn’t trust any health care statistics that come from a guy who adds up ‘three daughters and a wife’ and gets ‘five women’."--SteveB
"None of the dog bite or fatal dog attack studies conducted from 1959 to 1979 make any mention of either the pit bull or the Rottweiler. These two breeds of dogs were not popular as guard dogs, as the dogs of choice for negative functions were the German Shepherd, Great Dane or Doberman pinscher. Indeed, in the decade from 1965-1975, less than 2% of all the fatal dog attacks in the United States were attributed to either a pit bull, pit bull-type dog or Rottweiler."
|The Daily Show With Jon Stewart||Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c|
|The Born Identity|
(630): I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
(585): He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
(704): One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
(712): The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
"Teenage pregnancies and syphilis have risen sharply among a generation of American school girls who were urged to avoid sex before marriage under George Bush's evangelically-driven education policy, according to a new report by the US's major public health body.
In a report that will surprise few of Bush's critics on the issue, the Centres for Disease Control says years of falling rates of teenage pregnancies and sexually transmitted disease infections under previous administrations were reversed or stalled in the Bush years. According to the CDC, birth rates among teenagers aged 15 or older had been in decline since 1991 but are up sharply in more than half of American states since 2005. The study also revealed that the number of teenage females with syphilis has risen by nearly half after a significant decrease while a two-decade fall in the gonorrhea infection rate is being reversed. The number of Aids cases in adolescent boys has nearly doubled.
The CDC says that southern states, where there is often the greatest emphasis on abstinence and religion, tend to have the highest rates of teenage pregnancy and STDs."--The Guardian
"After a four-year hiatus, VH1 will bring back the legendary live concert event VH1 Divas by featuring some of pop music’s most talented female artists – Adele, Kelly Clarkson, Leona Lewis and Miley Cyrus. The VH1 Divas concert will be televised live on VH1 on Thursday, September 17 at 9/8c." -- VH1 press release
"I never beat my son. The media keep hollerin' saying that I beat my son. That's not true. You know where this beating started? The beating started in the slavery days when they used to beat the slaves, and then used to torture them. That's where this 'beating' started. These slave masters. And that's where that come from. But hey, there's a lot of people in America, Larry. A lot of people in America spank their kids. If they say they don't, they're lying. Now Michael was never beaten by me, never beaten at all."--Joe Jackson
"I've got bad news for you. Five out of five people are gonna die anyway."
Basic Way: Take two capsules three times a day.
Another Way: Throw out the notion that a printed set of directions will provide the exact answer.
"This is not just theory. And you can't start backpedaling just because the real-life situation carries a certain human weight."--Senior Vatican official
"Yes. Next question."--Michael Steele, Chairman RNC
"It is true that I did wrong and failed at the largest of levels, but equally true is the fact that God can make good of our respective wrongs in life. In this vein, while none of us has the chance to attend our own funeral, in many ways I feel like I was at my own in the past weeks, and surprisingly I am thankful for the perspective it has afforded."--Mark Sanford (hypocrite, R-SC)
"Perhaps the real problem with Pat Buchanan's narrative of America is that he views everything through a racial and ethnic filter. We're all in this thing together, and the last thing we need is to exacerbate the racial and ethnic divisions in America. Rejecting the anger and hatred and lies at the heart of Pat Buchanan's world view won't magically those divisions, but it sure would be a major step in the right direction."--Jed Lewison